Disney’s Artemis Fowl: A lesson on how to anger a fandom

Well, buckle up folks, because I have some choice words for Disney’s adaptation of Artemis Fowl. To put it mildly, the film was an absolute trainwreck – a slapdash and insultingly shallow interpretation of Eoin Colfer’s beloved book series.

First off, the casting was all wrong. The titular character, Artemis Fowl, was supposed to be a cunning and calculated child prodigy, but in the movie, he comes across as a sniveling, underdeveloped brat. To add insult to injury, beloved characters like Holly Short and Commander Root were reduced to one-dimensional caricatures with barely any screen time.

But the problems with this movie go deeper than just poor casting choices. The plot was muddled and confusing, leaving out key details and rushing through important events. It was as if the filmmakers were trying to cram a series of complex novels into a single film, and in the process, they lost sight of the heart and soul of the story.

To make matters worse, the movie was riddled with cheesy dialogue, cringe-worthy special effects, and awkward pacing. It was clear that Disney was trying to cash in on the success of other young adult fantasy franchises like Harry Potter and Percy Jackson, but they missed the mark entirely.

Artemis Fowl was an absolute mess of a movie, and a shameful disservice to the incredible source material. If you’re a fan of the books, I’d recommend avoiding this movie like the plague – it’s a real stinker.